Eating with Egyptians

(This article has been updated as of August 8, 2018.)

I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people—not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother [fellow believer] if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? God judges those outside.“Purge the evil person from among you.” 1 Corinthians 5:9-13

I noticed something interesting the other day. In Genesis 43:32, the Egyptians would not eat with the Hebrews, because that was an abomination to them. In Galatians 2:11-14, Peter (Cephas) didn’t want to eat with Gentiles (as was the custom of the Jews to refrain from doing – Acts 10:28) even though I don’t find any such instructions for them in the Old Testament (except I think it had to do with the fear of touching an unclean thing and becoming unclean themselves). Peter was reprimanded by Paul, since believing Jews and Gentiles are now being made into one new man. (Eph. 2:11-22)

So believers have received instructions as to how to please God in this matter, but there often seems to be a disconnect in carrying them out—just as some perhaps well-meaning (?) believers do not understand that the food restrictions do not apply to the Church. (Mark 7:14-23, Acts 15:20, 29, Acts 21:25, Rom. 14:14-23, 1Tim. 4:1-5, Titus 1:15 – as opposed to sexual immorality, which was repeatedly reaffirmed to be unacceptable for believers – 1Cor. 5, Rom. 13:13, 1Cor. 6:12-18, 1Cor. 7:2, 1Cor. 10:8, 2Cor. 12:21, Gal. 5:19-21, Eph. 5:13, Col. 3:5, 1Thess. 4:3-8, 1Tim. 1:8-11, Heb. 12:14-17, Heb. 13:4, Jude 1:7, Rev. 2:14-16, Rev. 2:20-23, Rev. 9:21, Rev. 21:8, Rev. 22:15). The reason that particular sin (in its varied and numerous forms) is so rampant is that Satan knows very well how important it is to God that His people remain pure—our bodies are His temple! (1Cor. 3:16-17, 1Cor. 6:19-20, 2Cor. 6:16. Eph. 2:19-22)

I don’t know about you, but I have sometimes found myself in a position of eating with people who fit Paul’s criteria to avoid—people who claim to believe, but are living with someone as though married even though they are not. It’s a tough spot to be in (once you know what the Bible says) because they are often beloved family members. Usually they “plan to get married,” which factors into their failure to understand what’s wrong with it in these permissive times in which we live. This world believes there is nothing wrong with “eating the wedding cake” before the wedding—just like the modern Church thinks that you can “have your cake” (the kingdom of God) “and eat it, too” (love the world). But that’s not true.

For the most part, I’ve noticed that those living in worldly sin do not actually have a close relationship with God. Maybe they used to attend worship services, but don’t now—perhaps because their consciences trouble them (but not enough to change their behavior). Or worse, they may be slipping in their faith—choosing to indulge the flesh rather than be close to God. (Gal. 5:13, 16, 24, Rom. 13:14) You can’t do both. Sin hardens the heart against God. (Heb. 3:12-14) So I tend to think they are probably not true believers (or perhaps very immature ones) if they don’t know better than to deliberately practice sin as though God doesn’t see or care what they do as His children. That is not what a person who knows Him very well would do, is it? For Jesus to die so that we can continue sinning intentionally, that would make no sense at all, would it? (Rom. 6, John 8:34-36, Titus 3:3, 2Pet. 2:18-22)

As for me, I’m finding this to be an awkward dividing point. Family doesn’t want to talk about “religion and politics” at gatherings (or maybe not at all, ever). It’s considered rude—and the two are closely related. We Christians can’t separate our faith from any part of our life, since believers ARE the church, the Body of Christ, 24/7/365.25. I can’t vote for someone who does not share my biblical values. I definitely don’t think we should argue with one another or be deliberately offensive, but that doesn’t mean keeping silent, either. At the end of the day, our true family consists of our brothers and sisters in Christ, according to the Bible. (Matt. 12:46-50, 1John 4:5-6)

When addressing sin in families (in particular, of professed believers), we have to be prepared to live with the consequences of speaking the truth in love. We may lose their fellowship, but that is actually preferable to losing our fellowship with Christ. (1John 1:5-7) Paul said in 1Cor. 5:5 that it’s better for an unrepentant sinner to be out of fellowship temporarily than to lose their soul (by thinking our including them indicates they need not repent). (1John 2:28-29, 2Cor. 12:21) If our being around them, minding our own business and keeping our opinions to ourselves, has not made any difference, then we shouldn’t tell ourselves that we HAVE to continue doing so, or “they’ll never come around.” They don’t need reassurance they are “fine” with God—they need a wake-up call! (1Cor. 15:34, Rom. 13:11-14, 1Thess. 5:5-7, Eph. 5:15-17, Rev. 3:2-3)

We don’t change their hearts—God does, and He is able. We pray and trust Him. We calmly stand firm. We choose our words carefully so as not to cast any stumbling blocks, but if we can’t please both, we choose to please God over men (even mature adult family members—except Paul said in 1Cor. 7:12-16 that an unbelieving spouse may be positively influenced by observing the faith of a believing spouse, it’s different because of how the “two become one” when married). (Gal. 1:10) I would NEVER suggest that we should HATE anyone, but the truth is that we ARE told to “hate” anyone tries to lead us away from Christ—the same as we would “hate” someone who were intentionally trying to kill us or someone we love. This physical life is short, but our spiritual condition determines where we spend eternity, which is forever. (Mark 8:36-38)

The separation in BOTH the Old and New Testaments of God’s people from the rest of the world has the purpose of PROTECTION of the body of called-out believers. What does the temple of God have to do with idols? (2Cor. 6:14-7:1) Bad company corrupts good morals. (1Cor. 15:33-34) A little leaven leavens the whole lump. (1Cor. 5:6-8 – Bear in mind that causing another to sin, whether by force or by influencing them through encouragement and approval of it, is included in evil and “malice”/intent to harm another. 1Thess. 4:1-8, Matt. 18:7-10, Matt. 5:19, Rom. 13:8-14 – don’t stop reading at v. 10.)

And this is where we’re at today. The Church is leavened. We were supposed to love the world so that they can hear the message and be SAVED, not love the WAYS of the world. Compromising on the truth is deadly, the same as adding only a “little poison” to our food or drink may also be lethal. We need to hold fast to receive what was promised—put on the whole armor of God to remain standing until the end. (Heb. 6:11-12, Heb. 10:36, Eph. 6:10-20) Run the good race, fight the good fight. (1Cor. 9:24-27, 1Tim. 6:11-12, Heb. 12:1-4) Remember, the five foolish virgins who were not ready when the bridegroom came for them did NOT enter in. (Matt. 25:1-13)

But many people say, “only God saves, and so we should just ‘love’ everybody.” That is TRUE of salvation, but we are called to make disciples. (Matt. 28:19-20) Being loving requires telling the truth, even if it’s uncomfortable. (Eph. 4:15-32) People who are deceived by lies being told inside the Church are pretty slow to seek the truth, because they trust that they already have it. The Holy Spirit doesn’t convict sinners when they hear reassurances that there is no such thing as sin. He does so when people hear the FULL counsel of God. (Acts 20:26-35) He convicts them when they hear the truth and examine their own lives in its light. (2Cor. 13:5, 1Tim. 6:3-16, 2Tim. 4:1-5) The answer to not being a hypocrite is not to embrace sin, but to deal with our own first before we speak out against it. (Matt. 7:3-5) Paul said that God will judge the world. It’s our job to judge those inside, for the health of the Body of Christ, with restoration of the sinner to fellowship upon repentance as the goal. (2Cor. 2:4-9)

Thankfully for us, there is a difference in the way we deal with sinning believers between the Old Covenant and the New Covenant. In Exodus 32:25-29, the Levites had to kill even their family members who worshiped the golden calf. (Also see Deut. 13.) We can at least be glad there is NO such requirement made of us today (nor would it please God if we did so), but we ARE to break fellowship with believers who refuse to repent. Jesus Himself even taught this to His disciples in Matthew 8:15-17. IF our brother or sister in the Lord later repents, we are to GLADLY restore fellowship with them, rejoicing!

As for unbelievers, God knows that we live in this sin-fallen world—the very one He sent His Son to save. If we have no contact with them, how will they hear the Good News? Jesus came to SAVE the souls of sinners, not to merely “befriend” them, but still have the end be that they perish. As I update this message, there are ads on television for a show coming this fall about being “friended” by God on social media. We can assume that the Gospel, which includes both acknowledgment of sin and repentance from it, will NOT be presented in this show. People only want to hear about a “feel-good” kind of God these days, but that has been the case for many years now. The show “Touched by an Angel,” which ran from 1994-2003, never ONCE presented the Gospel—Jesus taking the penalty for our sins was never mentioned. But true freedom BEGINS when a person receives the free gift of saving faith. (Eph. 2:8-10, Titus 3:3-8, 1John 3:1-10) Only then does the Holy Spirit start His work of transforming each believer into the image of Christ. (Rom. 12:1-2, Eph. 4:17-24, Col. 3:5-10) Only then does someone have His power within themselves to resist temptation and desire to know and do His will rather than their own. (Phil. 2:12-16, Titus 2:11-15) It’s a process.

Gentleness is crucial in these matters. The Bible says to restore the believer who has been caught up in sin with gentleness, but not to be tempted ourselves. (Gal. 6:1) We are not to be overly argumentative or “lose it.” (2Tim. 2:22-26) The fruits of the Spirit are love, gentleness, self-control, patience, kindness, goodness, peace, faithfulness and joy. (Gal. 5:22-25) Maybe it would help bring straying sinners back to close relationship with Jesus (bearing fruit and abiding in Him – John 15:1-10) if we had a private, heart-to-heart talk with them and admitted they are putting us in a tough spot. However, if they respond negatively (and perhaps others as well, in their “defense”), the Bible tells us to expect it. (2Tim. 3:12-17) We may have to make a choice—love our family more than God (which is idolatry) or pay for our allegiance to Him by being treated like a “hater.” (Matt. 10:37-39, Matt. 5:10-16, 1Pet. 4:1-5) Whatever happens, we need to resist any urge to defend ourselves or “get even”—that is God’s place. (Rom. 12:14-21, 1Pet. 3:8-17)

I have to say, I have struggled and failed on this issue. I know that I’m by no means perfect myself, and I was afraid to do more harm than good by making an issue of it. I didn’t want to hurt feelings of the people I love and cause a family rift. I also took into consideration (right or wrong) that in these times, people are DECEIVED into thinking that believers are “free” to behave in ways that grieve God. The culture is one of permissiveness, and young believers are being led away from God through public education, where God is pretty much banned. “Tolerance” is offered to everyone EXCEPT Christians—it’s okay to JUDGE them for “judging.” The “freedoms” and “rights” that people insist upon these days are not the same as those offered by Jesus. Humility and obedience are considered weaknesses in this age. All of this was predicted in advance:

It may help to remember that treating someone “like a tax collector” (Matt. 18:15-17) does not mean hating them. We love even our enemies. (Matt. 5:43-48, Luke 6:27-36, Rom. 12:20, Exo. 23:4-5) (Tax collectors in those days collected more than they had to in order to line their own pockets, so they were very unpopular. Luke 13:12-13, Luke 19:1-10) But that love does not include giving people permission to disregard and even despise the ways of God and yet continue calling themselves by His name. (2Tim. 2:19, Titus 2:11-15, 1Tim. 5:20, Titus 3:8, 1Thess. 4:1-8, Jude 1:3-4, Ezek. 36:16-36 – God STILL doesn’t want His holy name profaned by His children practicing evil. Matt. 12:33-37, 13:47-49, Mark 7:21-23, Rom. 16:19, 1Cor. 14:20, 2Cor. 5:9-10, Gal. 5:19-21, Col. 1:21-23, Col. 3:5-10, 1Thess. 5:19-22, Heb. 5:14, Jam. 1:12-16, 1Pet. 2:16, 1John 2:1-6, 1John 3:6-10, 3John 1:11, Rev. 22:11) We obey out of love, gratitude and respect. If we don’t obey Jesus, we don’t love Him. (John 14:15-24, 2Cor. 5:14-15, 1John 5:3) If we don’t obey Him, He’s not our Lord and Savior. (Rom. 10:8-10) There is no such thing as Him being ONLY our Savior, but not our Lord as well. (Acts 2:36)

Personally, I think I will continue assessing each situation as it comes up and try to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s leading, praying continually that my thoughts, words and actions will honor God and shine HIS light on everyone with whom I come into contact. ❦